I like big butts...

In real life, I’m not 22 and a dancer.  I don’t weigh 118 pounds.  And I don’t have a tiny little butt.

So I completely enjoyed the man that wanted someone that looked like I REALLY look.  I have a butt.  I won’t deny it.

“I want to kiss it, lick it, worship it,” he moaned.

Wow, really?  I mean, it’s a bit soft…

“Love that soft, round ass.”

Well, ok then.  Go for it.

“I love licking and kissing it, I love pulling your ass cheeks apart and tonguing your tight little asshole.”

Mmmmkay.  But what about you?  Shouldn’t I be doing something for you?  Sucking your cock, perhaps?

“No, I want to spend more time playing with your ass.”

Well, ok.  This is easy.  Wait, need to moan a bit, emphasize how much joy this brings me…there we go.

“I think–I think I’m going to come,” he pants.

Wait, what?  Really?  I mean, we haven’t done ANYTHING for him at all yet.  Really?  He’s going to come?  Dang.

“I’m coming, I’m coming all over that beautiful ass of yours.”

Sure, ok.  More power.

“I want to lick my come off of you, get you all clean.”

Less common, that one, but not unheard of.  Go for it.

“Mmmmm….now your beautiful ass is as clean as it deserves to be.”

Thank you.

“Thank you, that was great.”

Wow, all that and manners, too?  Most men hang up without saying anything.

Awesome call.  Great guy.

[Via http://sexwars.wordpress.com]

SCAM WEBSITE!!!

Do not buy anything from comicsupply.com! Just found out it is a big scam company and have swindled hundreds of people by taking their money and not shipping any orders. They swindled me too. It is people like this that nearly makes me ashamed to be put in the same species category of homosapien (human).
Something needs to be done!! The owner needs to be sued and fess up to everything!!

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Via http://buddhkist.wordpress.com]

Jeff Koons Sucks

So tonight, on Twitter, OvationTV and I’ve had a great conversation about who is an artist and who isn’t, and who should get credit and for art work and who shouldn’t.

It all started when I asked what the person who does their Twitter about their thoughts on Andy Warhol and we basically agree that yes, Andy had his time but now, give him a break.

Then I was asked about Jeff Koons and if I thought he was over rated.  And the following blog is basically how I feel about Mr. Koons.  Mr. Koons is an unbelievable thinker and creater, he has idea for production that I wish that I could get or be able to create (I’m lacking the money, so if anyone wants to chip in…then all is welcome ) but an artist? HA, I don’t think so.  Not anymore at least.  He is the brains behind the creation, but as anyone how knows anything about Koons knows that he has a whole entire fucking team of artist who do his pieces for him.  He  goes through and has AMAZING ideas…but the factory of unknamed people who paints and sculpts his pieces are not ever once named in any way, shape or form in the creation of the work is just insane.  Mr. Koons goes through and takes credit of other’s people’s hard labor and calls it his own.

The thing that I can say Koons is now like is someone like Walt Disney who yes, at first created his own works like Steam Boat Willie and the other cartoons which featured Mickey Mouse and his other characters but when it came down to the movies and later cartoons, it became the Walt Disney Company and each artist go credit for his or her own part in the production.  Why can’t Koons do this and stop taking credit for other people’s hard work?  Even other people who have been featured on OvationTV like David LaChapelle who work with a team said that he is nothing more than a “button pusher at the end of the day”.  I think that Koons should take a note for LaChapelle’s or Disney’s book and say that he is nothing more than just the brains behind the creation, and start to give credit to those people who actually do the work for the pieces that we all know him for and the pieces that he still shows today. Theatre and dance companies also give credit to everyone involved in the production, from set design to the spotlight people to the director to costume design, not just the main actor…Is Koons just that stuck up that he thinks that he can be an asshole and just slap his name on work that other people have done the mass amount of work on and say that it was his.

But, what can we do about this?  Is Koons too well known as an “artist” for this to change?  I say no.  Even though he might be the best known American artist at this current moment in time, I feel that if those who feel the same as I do make enough of a voice, maybe things could change where he would start to show some respect by those who do the labor work for him.  Either that, or we can count on the fact that maybe one of us will be under Koons’ labor camp doing a massive amount of work on one of his projects and not being able to get any public credit for our work what so ever, and my thoughts…yes the experience is good, but I want the world to know what I’ve done and not let someone else show work that I’ve done under their name.

[Via http://chrisortizphoto.wordpress.com]

Day 73 (1/17/10): Kegger

I don’t think I was ever much of a college party kind of guy, even in college. At least, not the frat party kind of guy, but a girl I’d recently been in contact with from my alma mater told me about an alumni frat thing, and begged me to go to it.  If there is nothing else MLK day is good for, it’s an inappropriate Sunday party at a predominately Caucasian school So, I took the long train ride home prepping with a flask of Jameson.  After the train and the cab I stepped onto all familiar pavement. I walked around the campus a little bit, trying to re-adjust, and get my bearings.

Eventually my phone rang and it was Jamie, calling me to tell me she was right behind me, in a general faux stalker-kind of way. I laughed and we were back in a cab to the Frat house. I almost immediately regretted this decision, bout I powered through. Five bucks and a wrist band gave me an excuse to go back to my college days.

Only, I didn’t like keggers in my college days. You meet the worst girls at keggers, and you meet the guys you don’t want to be stuck with. I found a corner and hid until a girl I later learned to be named Faith drunkenly grabbed me and tried to get me to dance. I shook my head.  She asked what I did do, and I told her I was a pretty good shot in beer pong. But the fact of the matter is, much like friendship and fucking, you only make good partners with some people, and we got our asses handed to us.  Faith cupped my face in consolement, and tried to kiss me, and this is when it hit me that I hadn’t seen Jamie in more than a while, and I dreaded why. Sure enough, she was off playing with some boy toy for the evening, and I was strained alone with Faith and losing hope. I grabbed another cup out of the keg of PBR…a college staple. But a few beers, and being corned, and bad judgement set it, and I spent a good two minutes with my hand on the small of her back, and kisses I couldn’t take back. Luckily, I was shortly rescued, and passed out on the foot of the bed in a Hilton shortly thereafter.

[Via http://100girls100days.com]

ButtFlashin' or Studio Maintenance?

Frankly, we don’t remember what Allie was doing here, but it looks like she was trying to prop up the ceiling with that impromptu “stripper pole” we installed in our studio.  

Poledancer or Propping Up the Ceiling?

Well, whatever she’s doing, she looks hot doing it.

[Via http://gohoochie.wordpress.com]

We know who you are...

I’ll keep this blog short tonight.

The funny thing happened to me this morning.  I received a direct message on Twitter from the Lawrence Art Center.  It was a small part of a conversation where I asked them (because I knew that they were going through some changes) what their submission process is.  The person who does their Twitter gave me the proper email address to do a proposal.

I didn’t know if it would be like a blind email to the guy who’s email address that I was just given, so I simply asked him if he or anyone there had heard of me or my photography, which for those of you who don’t know is Chris Ortiz Photography (google it to see some more of my images…but like I said before, don’t steal my images and claim that they are yours to try and impress a girl, I do have the legal rights to my photographs and it is just really sad that you can’t get a girl on your own) and this was what their twitter person said to me.

“I myself have not, but people in the office have.”

I find that pretty awesome to know that my art work has now become, I’ll say somewhat known, in my home city and for something good (trust me, I’d hate to be known here for some of the crap that I’ve gotten away with thus far in my life).  I’ve never had this happen to me before.  It is rather an awesome feeling.

I said this at midnight, new years eve to my best friend Rob, but I’ll say it again.  I have a big feeling that 2010 will be a huge year for me and my photography.

[Via http://chrisortizphoto.wordpress.com]

Miley Cyrus butt floss – Mom / Milf / Pimp

Here’s Miley Cyrus and her MILF of a Mom that’s been pimping her out the past few years.
After that’s a couple of pic’s of Miley frolicking around in a tight ass bikini like any teenage girl that’s worth millions and millions of dollars.

  

[Via http://ianspenser.wordpress.com]